Quiet Ways for Quiet People

I admire my church friends who are outspoken for Christ. They tell stories of converting strangers in the hospital, in the grocery store, in a park. One of these women, a breast cancer survivor who has been a great source of encouragement, has mentioned several times (and with great enthusiasm) that my current experience is a wonderful opportunity to share Christ's love with others. She told stories of addressing the other cancer patients in the infusion room, describing them as a captive audience ready and waiting for her witness.

She's right. It's easy to picture how God could use this experience, and it's amazing to hear how God used her in this way. However, she's also an extra-extra-extravert who enjoys starting conversations with strangers. I, on the other hand, am a quiet introvert and not outspoken about anything among strangers  I felt inadequate to what this friend envisioned and hoped her expectations for me didn't mesh with God's expectations. It's bad enough just to have cancer!

This left me wondering how God can use me, an introvert? I desire to do His will and am loathe to disobey by not passing by the opportunities He gives, the way the Levite passed the injured man in Jesus' story of the good Samaritan (Luke 10:25-37). I want to be His hands and voice in people's lives, the way others have been for me throughout this experience. I pray that He will use me to do His work on earth.

Here's the exciting part: God doesn't just equip us (including me!), He provides situations where our gifts are exactly what is required. For me, it's quiet ways and quiet people.

Instance #1: Two weeks ago, I was purposely late driving to Tuesday morning Bible study, taking my time to avoid the crowded group session, where my compromised immune system might be at greatest risk. On a quiet street, a frail-looking elderly woman walking by herself waved at me from the sidewalk. Surprised, I stopped the car, opened the window, and asked if she needed help. "I need a ride home," she said. "I walked too far and am tired." We drove nearly two miles to her apartment. That poor woman -- what a long way from home! As we drove, she thanked me over and over again. "Please," I told her, "It's a pleasure to help you. I have cancer and have been helped by so many people lately. I really wanted a chance to return the favor, so it's a blessing to me to be able to help you." Such bountiful care our God has! One of His children was tired and He provided a safe ride home. Another of His children had begged Him for a chance to return kindness and He provided the perfect opportunity -- placed her in exactly the right place at the right time. It's fine that I was quiet and introverted. He used me just the way I am.

Instance #2: I have a favorite jogging route (mapped 5 kilometers) through the quiet streets and cul-de-sacs near my home. Before surgery, I ran most mornings and often passed the same woman. We would wave or exchange a quick greeting. The day before the surgery, she stopped me for the first time to ask a question (if I'm European, of all things!). As we parted, I told her she wouldn't see me for awhile. We discussed why and she said she was a breast cancer survivor and wished me well. One month after the surgery, I finally felt able to jog again, though slowly. On this first run, I met the woman again. She stopped me to ask how I was doing and then confided that she had just found out her cancer is back. She was scared and upset. We stood on the side of the road crying and talking together for nearly 45 minutes. I told her that I would pray for her and, because she described herself as religious, reminded her of the power of prayer. She invited me to tea some day, and I look forward to getting to know her better. What a blessing! Another case of God putting me in exactly the right place and time. One of His children was hurting and scared and would rather tell her worries to a stranger than to her busy children. Another of His children had begged Him for a chance to return kindness. I am gifted with compassion and a desire to serve and a life slowed down by health concerns. I was not asked to initiate a conversation or entertain a room full of strangers -- things I have not been gifted to do -- but to use the very gifts I have.

Isn't it incredible to see the hand of God, the interwoven threads where His beloved people connect and their needs are met? This is the church, His pride and bride. We only see the smallest subset of these interconnections; if you aren't paying attention, they may even look like coincidences. But imagine the joy in heaven of seeing the entire, beautiful tapestry -- everything that worked together for His glory!

Infusion

Time to catch up on some writing!

I started chemotherapy ten days ago. One thought that struck me beforehand was the use of the word "infusion".

Chemotherapy is given by infusion, meaning the chemicals are delivered intravenously. Now, prior to all this cancer stuff, the word "infusion" meant something completely different to me. Something beautiful and natural and healthy. It fit with words like "aroma" and "herbal" and "extract". I'll quote the bottle of body wash sitting in my shower: "infused with all the alluring fragrance of cherry blossom and real extract of bamboo". Apparently, the cosmetics market has influenced my thinking!

This concept of infusion does NOT fit with the delivery of cell-killing poisons through a needle sticking into my vein, disturbing on many fronts.

Thankfully, I was able to endure my first infusion without focusing on the poison/vein goings-on. That's a huge and unexpected blessing, one I attribute to the prayers of many friends and family members. Rather, I rested (thanks to a Benadryl infusion!) and considered a third concept of infusion. I thought about spiritual infusion. Infusion implies something steeped or bathed in a manner that enters completely and thoroughly. When considering the mystery of the Spirit of God in our lives, perhaps infusion is a good word. The Bible talks about the Spirit of God "filling" or "coming upon" or "resting on" or "being poured on" someone. Sounds like a spiritual infusion to me.

Dear Father in heaven, infuse me with your spirit: your spirit of life, your spirit of peace, your spirit of wisdom. May I stand firm in Christ, who has anointed me, set His seal of ownership on me, and put His Spirit in my heart as a deposit, guaranteeing what is to come (2 Cor. 1:21-22). Amen.